Archive for April, 2008

Vulnerable

Yeah,
I did that
I said those things
I went to his house
I slept in his bed
He held me all night
I know what they think
I know that they say
I’m dumb
I’m making a mistake
I know i sound typical
I know i sound naive
But i’m not
We’ve both been hurt
So we’re a little less conventional
I mean sometimes it takes something big
Something huge and scary
To realize
Realize what you have and with whom
We love each other
And he’s gonna work on it
That’s all i can ask, huh
I’ve decided what i can give
And who i can be to him
I can’t save him
I can’t fix him
I can’t make everything better
As much as i want to
I can’t
Its too much and not my problem
I mean he’s mine but
His issues aren’t
So that’s where we’re at
Trying to work through our shit
Trying to be better people and
Better lovers
And better partners
Cause truth is we’re in love
Truth is neither of usĀ are getting any younger
If we put in all this work
Then this must be it
This must be as real as its gonna get
That’s scary
But exciting
A little unnerving
But what’s real true love
Without vulnerability
I’ve learned lots the hard way
I’ve gotten to where i am through the long road
I’m scared
Fuck yeah
But i’m here
Aren’t i
I’m yours
Aren’t i

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Neurosis

Sometimes I convince myself that I’m a sociopath.

A sociopath and none of my words

My eloquant, perfect words are true or real

Language is so tricky like that

How real are feelings and thoughts

If you can’t find the words for them

How real are feelings if all you ever do is feel them

They’re so individual

So what’s really the point in sharing

My definition of love is different from your’s

And her’s

My definition of devotion is unique

How can I hold you to my ideas

Are you really subject to my interpretations of your truth

Your reality

Do I mean the things I think and say anyway

Discussion creates uncertainty and confusion

So I don’t mind that you don’t always have the words

I don’t mind that sometimes you refrain

Cause I can feel you

Even if its not what you mean

Even if its not what you say

I get to decide

I get to make your actions towards me, mine

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